Gilbert Arenas would fit in Portland

I'm referencing only the city of course, not the Blazers. That would be terrible. Anyways, you have to appreciate how well the man would fit with this city:

• Gilbert Arenas is weird. And proud of it. So is Portland. (By the way, that is far from the strangest thing I've seen here. I'm not even sure what earns that distinction anymore. Once I saw fifty or so people walking around downtown dressed as Pirates. I asked the bartender what the reason was. He shrugged and said "Its Saturday." Christ.)
  
• Adidas North American Headquarters is based in Portland. They pay Gilbert lots of money. They wouldn't even have to mail him his checks anymore! Think of the postage savings!
  
• Arenas gets Obama tattoos. Portland sells Obama tote bags.
  

Again, I'm not advocating for him to join the Trailblazers. Again, what a horrible idea. Think about how jealous Channing Frye would get. But maybe Gilbert could live here in the off-season and enjoy our beautiful summers. And hang out with me. Yeah.