Thursday, May 29, 2008

Lakers win, Blazers fans resort to eating poo

Well that was interesting. The Blazers most hated imaginary rival just locked up the West. Things have been pretty gravy for the Lakers since the Gasol hijacking. The win tonight has me thinking more about that superstar with enough gravity to pull most basketball discussions his way, Kobe. This has really been an amazingly Mamba-ie year.

First we had the speaking out against management issue. This attention pushed his lovers and haters to once again vocalize how detached from reality they have become. You folks are silly.

Then of course, Gasol came and made everything better. Kobe gets MVP. Lakers get to the Western Conference Finals where they are up against what is perceived not so much as a mere team, but basketball purity descended directly from His sanctum. Luckily for them, one diety seems to have an injured ankle.

There was that non-call on Bones Barry at the end of game four, bringing both justified complaints and entertaining conspiracy rants. Proponents of a Lakers bias in officiating would be wise to consider that Kobe shot 11 total freethrows, in the series. In any event, the Lakers win. Kobe wins. Blazers fans reportedly consider eating poo to remove the unpleasant taste from their mouths. Gross.

Through these most recent developments, of course, has been the story mainstream media outlets are still weary of touching; Kobe's alleged affair with an 18 year old Laker girl (timelined for your convenience at Deadspin).

This year is Kobe personified. Loved as a great player and a winner, absolutely loathed as a perceived jerk. These dual extremes alone don't make Kobe compelling. To me, it is how they have been sprawling out concurrently.

Kobe throws a "trade me" tantrum. Lakers have best record in the West. Kobe gets MVP. Kobe has another sex scandal. Lakers beat the Spurs, win West.

We should know by now this is who Kobe is. This sequence is more than coincidence, it seems like the blueprint for his life. At the very least it serves as his soundtrack. The Lakers could still win the Championship, he could still be Finals MVP, and he could still win Olympic Gold this summer. Thats more hardware in a year than a lot of guys in the Hall of Fame accumulated over an entire career.

As this unfolds, who knows what direction his current scandal will take, what other information will be uncovered. Maybe there is something else lurking around the corner. Most of us will be watching, and most of us will continue to dedicate ourselves to loving or hating. This is Kobe Bryant.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

It should be an interesting finals, the physical defense of the Celtics vs. the speed of the hated Lakers. The Celtics do have home court but they are also older and don't have much of a bench.
It should be noted that the "whining" Spurs did not raise a fuss about the non-call at the end of game four, do you think the Lakers would have been as quiet had the situation been reversed?
Some interesting stats on foul shots. In the Spurs-Lakers series there were an average of 37.2 foul shots per game by both teams combined; in the Lakers-Jazz series the average was 64.8 per game. Yes, Kobe only shot 11 total free throws but I like to think that Bowen did a better job keeping Kobe from driving to the hoop thus resulting in fewer free throw attempts.
I have not yet resorted to eating poo but will keep that option in reserve if they win the finals.

Jack Brown said...

I've never argued that the Spurs are whiners, everyone complains. I think the negative labels some attach to the Spurs are more a manifestation of being frustrated/ jealous at the duration of their excellence. They win a lot, deep playoff runs mean basketball fans see a lot of the Spurs every year.

And yes, Bruce Bowen doesn't foul people. Good point. Seriously, 11 free throws!? In 3 of the 5 games, he took 1 or less! That means 1 or zero! He took 120 shots! 11 freethrows is only two more than Luke Walton! Luke Walton, who played 16 minutes a game and took 24 shots! How ever you want to explain that, it is pretty amazing to me.

Enjoy the poo, watch out for peanut shells.

Tyler J Hinds said...

Saying that hating the Spurs is a manifestation of being jealous of them is like saying the terrorists hate us because of our freedom. Personally, I hate the Spurs because they're cheap and they're pussies. Bowen is cheap - go to youtube and type in 'bruce bowen cheap play'. Tim Duncan had his wife throw a fit so that he could start in the all-star game. And let's not forget Horry slamming Nash into the scorer's table...

Jack Brown said...

I think their winning has an awful lot to do with why people hate them, thats kind of a given across sports.

Do more people hate the Red Socks or the Royals? The Patriots or the Browns? T'Wolves or the Spurs?

A lot of people that watch a team that isn't theirs win enough, they start hating. I'm one of them.