Nobody needs a nickname, but its fun to believe they do. Plus, I'm on board with the argument that initialized/abbreviated names are boring, played out, and need to be stopped. In Brandon's case, paying for this over use may hurt since "B.Roy" sounds nice. When you take a firm stand, concessions and exceptions are out, so on we go.
Ever since "The Nanny-Stopper," I've considered Slam Magazine as good an authority as any when it comes to nicknames. These days they do contests to come up with nicknames for players who are lacking, and one subject was Brandon Roy. I never saw it in print (the magazine makes me feel old, so is avoided), but heard the winner was "The Blade." Eh.
On this blog, I've taken to simply referring to him as "Everything," but thats describing what he gives to this team, not really a nickname. Through it all, there has been one option that I have silently approved of. It was suggested in the comments of the Slam post, and made an appearance on Deadspin, so maybe has a chance at gaining traction: RoyBot.
First of all, I really enjoy robots. But even if you don't, there's reasons to support this. For me it starts with the idea that
Watch a Blazer game with the player similarities in mind and tell me if you disagree. Both are smart, good at everything, team-oriented, systematic, athletic enough, big enough, quiescent, and most importantly, killing machines. I'm not saying Roy has reached the level of Duncan, but he's on his way. I can't help but think the two share the same soul, in this case a ghost in the machine. When I look at RoyBot I see a perimeter Timmy. Perhaps both come from the same Dr. Soong lab.
8 comments:
RoyBot? Not bad, but it's gonna be hard to make that stick. My fave for Oden is "the big Odini." Are we still going with L-Train for LaMarcus? Might as well.
Brandon is a hard one though. Too bad A.I. has two friggin nicknames, because Brandon is definitely "the Answer" for this team. So I gave it about 5 minutes of semi-intense thought/rumination. He was a Husky at UW, but "the husky" is no good. So I thought what about "the Wolf"? If I remember junior high bio correctly, I believe huskies descended from wolves which makes this work (for me it works). Plus Brandon attacks the paint like a hungry wolf. He is the leader of our pack. I could probably keep going with the wolf similes/analogies, but I gotta run to the Garden in hopes that "the Wolf" is ready to take a bite out of the Jazz. I'm done!
That's solid. I'm endorsing RoyBot mostly because I think it has the best chance of sticking (since a couple folks are using it already), assuming his teammates don't come up with something. We'll see how things go.
I really wish "The Natural" would stick as a Roy nickname. It's novel and certainly is more memorable than the generic "B. Roy". Plus it's just so apt. The different aspects of the game just seem to come so naturally to him, and everything he does on the floor just seems to be instinctive. Not raw physical talent like a Dwight Howard or a McGrady or what-have-you, just...natural.
Of course, the problem with the nickname "The Natural" has the unfortunate tendency to evoke striking images of Roy Hobbs limping off the plate in a bloody jersey, which isn't necessarily the sort of karma that's likely to propel this team into the playoffs, but there's tradeoffs in everything, isn't there?
I can't stand RoyBot and in my opinion no Blazers fan should endorse this nickname. Ask yourself: what do you like most about this Blazer team (despite the record)? Answer for most fans: the likable personalities we've assembled here in the Rose City. And what's the one thing a robot lacks?
The Big Fundamental, now that's flattering. RoyBot? That's got no soul, man, none. I'd take B. Smooth, The Natural, or the above-suggested Wolf over RoyBot in a heartbeat.
The thing about "The Natural" is it is pretty unoriginal at this point. If we're moving away from initial-nicknames because they're unoriginal, I don't see how replacing them with other banalities helps.
People have freaked out when I draw parallels to Duncan, but I can't help but see it. Tim Duncan has a VERY likeable personality (if you look hard enough), and is a well-known robot. Data, J5, and others, these are robots with personality. You sir, clearly have some prejudice against robots to say such things.
i refer to roy as smoothness or the smooth. thats what his game is. hes not gonna blow past you hes not gonna jump over you hes just smooth. there goes smooth with another leftie layup. smoothness in the corner knocks down a three. Smoothness hits another game winner. yeah that works foe me
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B. Real.....enough said.
Goodness, there's so much effective info above!
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